literature

Change // Sora

Deviation Actions

what-the-honk's avatar
Published:
6.9K Views

Literature Text

Kairi.

You just didn’t know what it was about her, but there was just something there that ticked you off to no end. Maybe you were just jealous of her? After all, she had straight A’s, combat ability, more friends than you could care to count, and to top it all off was a goddamn princess.

A Princess of Heart.

God, the very name was so corny it made you want to puke. Once Sora had returned from his journeys, he, Riku, and Kairi told you all about Kingdom Hearts and everything that came along with it.

Heartless, nobodies, keyblades, giant mutated animals that somehow gained the ability to speak and carry weapons. All of it sounded like nonsense, but the worst thing was the whole “friendship is magic” bullshit. You loved your friends, but they just put too much thought behind the whole thing. You felt nauseous whenever they started on one of their shitty monologues about how the true power of the world is light or love or some stupid crap. You’d always say the same thing in response.

“The true power of the world is power. I know, shocking right?”

They’d just laugh or brush off your greyed view of the world. After all, why should they listen to you? You didn’t fight Ansem or the Organisation. In fact you had nothing to do with anything they did. There was no heroic battle for you, no war against good or evil, no bonding with the friends you had grown up with and called your closest. Nothing.

You were left behind, like you always were.

You supposed maybe that’s why you grew a disliking to Kairi. Her closeness to the others, despite you knowing them first, the idea that she was just so heavily tied in with everything they were involved in.

You were there first. You knew Riku and Sora long before she did, and yet it just seemed like it was fate that she take your only friends from you. Why else would she be so connected to them while you were left in the dust?

It had been a few years. You were nearing eighteen years old now, as were the others. You found it quite funny that even after all of the shit they’d been through they weren’t above going back to high school. Defenders of the universe, and there they were, sitting in class and stressing over homework like you had been doing since they abandoned you to play the heroes.

Nothing was the same between you. Of course, you expected there to be change – why wouldn’t there be? But you, at the very least, wanted to rejoin the group they’d formed in your absence. You wanted to be close to them again.

And Sora. How long had you harboured feelings for him? When he left all those years ago, you went through unimaginable bouts of anxiety in your wonders on his whereabouts. Was he safe? Probably not. Was he happy? Maybe he was.

Did he miss you at all?

You still hadn’t figured that out.

After walking the others to their homes, you and he had been left on the pathway leading to your own abodes. Directly next to each other. That was how you met, after all. Once you moved in, you immediately became friends.

But did he care for that? Did fate?

You sighed and tugged on the white sleeves of your uniform. In a few months you wouldn’t have to wear this stupid thing anymore.

Sora turned to face you. He frowned a little in concern. “Hey, something wrong?”

You looked up at him. He’d grown so tall over time. You remembered when you had towered over him – now it was reversed. So much had changed, and you weren’t present for it.

“Do you... care for me, Sora?” you asked.

“What? Of course I do, you’re one of my oldest friends.”

You looked away. You knew he’d say that. “Ah.”

“Ah?”

“It’s just... You and Kairi and Riku, all of you left to go on your big adventure and journey of self-discovery. While you were off figuring out the ‘true meaning of friendship’ I was left here. No one noticed me; I was just by myself. In the dark.”

His expression softened at the hurt in your voice. “[First]...”

“You guys are the only friends I’ve made. I tried to make others, but they didn’t want anything to do with me. I was alone for so long, then you come back and all you talk about is how much fun and excitement you had without me.”

“Do we really talk about it that much?”

“You do. You really do.”

He sheepishly rubbed the back of his neck. “Sorry...”

“I feel like I’m not important. You saved the entire universe without thinking of me once, what use am I to you now that you’re back with us lowly students?”

Sora stopped to glance over at his house. So, you’d made it home. A shame the walk here wasn’t as long as you remembered it being. Just another thing that changed, you supposed.

“Listen, [First], you are our friend no matter what you think. Don’t feel bad. You’re important to us.” He paused. “...I’ve gotta go, if I’m home late again my parents won’t be happy.”

The light faded from your eyes as he said that. You had just poured your heart out to him – everything you’d been feeling over the years – and that’s all he said? ‘Don’t feel bad’? How was that going to help you feel better?

That’s it, then. He didn’t care. He didn’t return your feelings, didn’t miss your presence, and didn’t care enough to comfort you more than a couple sentences.

You nodded solemnly. “Sure.”

“I’ll see you at school tomorrow, ‘kay? I’ll swing by around seven, we’ll walk together.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that. I really don’t.”

He furrowed his brows in confusion. What did you mean by that? Was something happening? He didn’t allow himself to think on it. You were in a bad spot, and you just needed some sleep. You’d be fine in the morning, he was sure.

Sora left to go inside his home, you watched him as he left you to yourself. In the dark. Again.

You walked. Past your house, past the neighbourhood, out of the city. Everything that had kept you there wasn’t worth it any longer. You were finished with dealing with heartache like this, with being left behind and replaced by someone else, with being consumed by envy at someone who had waltzed in and stole your friends from your grasp. It was too much, and you were no longer willing to stand by and watch them flourish as you withered.

With how much you had missed them, with how little they missed you, was it really so surprising that you never returned to that place?
idk about u guys but i personally always hated the "pure light" trope and also REALLY loved the idea of like the fourth member to a trio (who got kicked to the curb. in this case its u! hooray!)

anyway i felt like doing this. so i did. originally i was going to throw some kairi-bashing in but like no thats tasteless af
© 2015 - 2024 what-the-honk
Comments50
Join the community to add your comment. Already a deviant? Log In

When will you continue this!?